(c) ... McTavish 2004. All rights ... a spot of serenity ... in the ... I recently booked a ... dodgy berth on the White Elephant Express Space ... to (c) Theolonius McTavish 2004. All rights reserved.Seeking a spot of serenity somewhere in the universe, I recently booked a deep-discount dodgy berth on the White Elephant Express Space Shuttle, to a little known place in a galaxy far, far away.IT (otherwise known as HD 36405.b) is not your average oddball exo-solar planet made of rock that wobbles on its end and zips around a nearby star in less than 2.46 days.Most linear thinkers have a great deal of difficulty even comprehending why on earth anyone in their right mind would be interested in visiting a planet called IT. Not being a linear thinker with an investment in the right answer, I didnt give a hoot. After all, what does one (who walks on water and listens to miffed mortals all day long) do for a frigging night off, now I ask you?If truth be told, (after reading random excerpts from The Itty Bitty Bunkum Book About Life, the Universe and Practically Everything Under the Sun Not To Mention Stuff Going On In Remote Galaxies), I was simply delirious. According to its noted author, Dr. Jarn Leffer, IT is a must-see for those with little time on their hands and a passionate interest in Innocuous Things.As planets go, IT is a pretty ho-hum celestial pit-stop with perhaps one exception the welcome notice that reads, Cosmic Cowboys - Welcome to the furthest unexplored outreaches of the Galaxy Home to the Flop Fairy and Oodles of Gadflies!IT is populated by colonies of giggling, green grasshoppers . What else would you expect to inhabit a far-flung, fantasy-challenged hellhole like this? But, what made IT strictly speaking a strange place was the fact that the inhabitants munch on green, biodegradable garbage bags just for fun. Lacking masticating capabilities, the gadflies process their food by vigorously jumping up and down on it. No wonder they have no need for fast-food franchises, strip malls or landfills!Anyway, I picked up this picturesque postcard of the blessed ballyhooing buglugs. They look perfectly happy but dont be deceived. In reality, theyre just a gang of glad-handing grasshoppers. They dont play golf, eat burgers, or drink beer -- and none can frost a rock! Come to think of it, apart from the company of bugs and the elusive flop fairy, this pathetic planet has precious little going for IT!!To put "IT" bluntly, life on IT is just shy of a tittynope*. The jolly green grasshoppers and the carefully manicured green fairways with sand traps as far as the eye can see certainly make for an utterly harmless world. Regrettably, without a pair of golf clubs, a dimpled white ball, and the notion that 19th hole even exists on this planet -- IT is about as fun as bag of toads!Life Lesson 42: Remember to talk to your travel agent before ever embarking on a flight of fancy to a planet called IT in a galaxy named Have-a-Nice-Day!! __________*"Tittynope" for you whiffling word-peckers means "a small quantity of anything left over".If you want to know what those green, glad-handing grasshoppers from "IT" look like -- ask any four-year old, or failing that request some help from a Flying Saucer Club member. Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com .
Top blog stories
A review of Idmobile.com
Idmobile.com offers both pay-as-you-go and contract plans. Pay-as-you-go plans are ideal for customers who don't want to be tied down to a long-term contract, and they can purchase bundles of data, minutes, and texts as and when they need them.
Idmobile.com offers both pay-as-you-go and contract plans. Pay-as-you-go plans are ideal for customers who don't want to be tied down to a long-term contract, and they can purchase bundles of data, minutes, and texts as and when they need them.
AO.co is a trusted expert in TVs, washing machines, clothes dryers and other household appliances. AO.com is one of the largest retailers in the UK and it specializes in electronics, clothes and home furniture.
At Three, we believe phones are good. They just make life better. Easier. And more fun. But
we all need to find a balance that works for us. Our mission is to help our customers use
their phones to live their best lives.
We make your life easier
Since 1992, we’ve been helping customers get the best deal on their dream phone. We firmly believe in giving you the highest quality, for the lowest price. That’s why we work with three of the UK’s leading networks to do all the haggling for you,...
At Halfords, we're all about the journey. With more than 700 stores with over 10,000 colleagues, we're the UK's leading retailer of automotive and cycling products. We are also the leading operator in MOT, tyres, car servicing and car repairs - pleasing more than 750,000 customers every year.
It's important to us that everyone gets great customer service and can enjoy our products, no matter their level of sight. So, if you're blind, partially sighted or struggle to see or read the screen, we’ve a range of features to help you get the most from our products and...
Look iconic, without the hassle— using Nasty Gal discount codes, you can shop your favorite pieces for way less by simply entering one of our promotional codes (of your choice) at the checkout. From delivery offers, to promo deals, we keep ‘em coming, so you always have the offer you...
The Covid-19 has caused the school and universities to shut down around the world creating a major issue in Learning and Education. As this virus spreads through the interaction and if social distanci... The Covid-19 has caused the school and universities to shut down around the world creating a major...
Why its Important to Manage Your Holiday Calendars?
A printable calendar 2021 is a prominent online platform where you download printable calendars of your choice. These calendars can be customized as per our client requirement with photo, text, logo, or any other image. If you are thinking of planning a dream vacation tour with family and kids but...
A ladies sleepwear basic, the women's robe is an essential lingerie style. The majority of women have at least a couple of robes in their wardrobe. But there is so much more to this favorite lingerie style than velour or cotton robes. The womens robe has become a must have...
0 false 18 pt 18 pt 0 0 false false false /* Style Definitions */ ... HOW DO I? By Jr Davis [email protected]` How Do I? Almost everyday of my life, not soon after waking up this is the first question I ask myself. How do I get everything done...
"How will I know when to divorce and finally find freedom for myself and the kids?" you ask yourself again and again. "How can I get this nightmare behind me and just get the fastest divorce possible... Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com
Have you stopped smiling due to the poor discolouration of your teeth, uneven length or wide gaps in your mouth? If this is you, shout with joy as you no longer need to suffer with these problems now that Dental Veneers are available. Discover the advances and cost savings now...
This article is addressing one simple but very important question to ask; who will own my domain name? Registering a domain name is one of the very first steps in the web design process and it is one of the most common services that is taken for granted. Part of...
Teeth Whitening is the big buzz at the moment but is it good for you? After treatment some people suffer from Sensitive Teeth and Gum irritations. Did you also know that if you have Crowns or Veneers they will not change colour like your natural teeth? There is a better...
Search topic
Teeth Whitening - Is it Enough?
Teeth Whitening is the big buzz at the moment but is it good for you? After treatment some people suffer from Sensitive Teeth and Gum irritations. Did you also know that if you have Crowns or Veneers they will not change colour like your natural teeth? There is a better...