"Honey, can I have a cup of lemon tea," my wife asked me the other day. ... my wife doesn't ask me to do ... knowing my laziness has no bounds. But my wife had a cold - a very bad cold. Fo "Honey, can I have a cup of lemon tea," my wife asked me the other day. Normally, my wife doesn't ask me to do anything, knowing my laziness has no bounds. But my wife had a cold - a very bad cold. For most illnesses, my wife would just "suck it up" and get her cute little behind out of bed, fully realizing that nothing would get done around the house without her. But today, she was lingering beneath the bed covers. That's how I knew she was really sick.My wife is tougher than Randall "Tex" Cobb on his best day (and for those of you who don't know who Randall "Tex" Cobb is - shame on you!). Her finely developed sense of martyrdom compels her to force herself into activity, even in the face of the killer cold. Being the caring husband that I am (and not wanting her germs spread through the entire house), I suggested she stay in bed.So, even though it was a Sunday, which is a very inconvenient day for her to be sick (because I usually park my large, ugly behind on my favorite chair and watch TV all day), I knew I would have to "suck it up" and do something feared by most men. Parenting.For me, watching the kids for an entire day is nothing short of exhausting. And the kids don't seem to want to make it any easier for me. You'd think they'd just sit there and watch TV all day, like Daddy.But no. They want me to feed them. I made my first blunder by asking what they wanted to eat. "Pancakes," shouted my daughter. "Buttery eggs," shouted my son. "How about cereal?" shouted Daddy. Unfortunately, since I'd already made the mistake of asking, I was trapped. Lucky for me, my wife has the good sense to purchase microwave pancakes and egg beaters just for these kinds of emergencies. I was saved from forcing Cocoa Puffs down the kids' throats, and after getting most of the dishes into the sink, I tried to sit down and watch TV with the kids. "I want to watch Nickelodeon," griped my son. "I want to watch the Disney Channel," moaned my daughter. "I want to watch ESPN," I whined. Right away, they knew to ignore me. So it became a contest of evenly matched opponents.The next 15 minutes involved both of them trying to make their cases to me while attempting to harass or cajole the other to their side. I finally put an end to it by switching to ESPN. Instantly, they were comrades in arms, and presented a united front in their TV viewing preference.I went upstairs to see if the wife was feeling any better (in hopes that she would come downstairs and relieve me of my parenting misery). She was still sleeping, but I'm pretty sure she could hear my footsteps and closed her eyes as I approached. Note to self - get some slippers with a soft sole.Having "made" breakfast, I decided to save myself a little work and hit the drive-thru at McDonald's. Even a decision as simple as taking the easy way out and feeding my kids fat-laden fast food is an exercise in humility.You can't just order a regular meal with my kids. My daughter won't eat cheese and doesn't like onions on her burger. My son won't eat anything but cheese and bread, so I have to order a cheeseburger without the meat, onions, ketchup, mustard, or pickles. Just cheese and a bun. And God forbid if you forget to ask for a girl's toy for her and a boy's toy for him.I don't know how my wife does it. I couldn't even relax after lunch because the kids had other plans. They wanted to play games. We decided to play Funny Bunny. This game makes Chutes and Ladders seem like chess, involving no skill whatsoever. I still couldn't win.Having exhausted my supply of stupid game patience, I went and checked on the wife. She was starting to feel a little bit better, so she asked me to bring her some more tea and to prop up her pillows so she could watch some Lifetime chick-flick movie. I think I'll use her toothbrush tonight to see if I can catch her cold. Seems like a pretty good gig. At least it's a heck of a lot easier than parenting.(c)2003 Chuck Smith. All rights reserved. Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com .
Top blog stories
A review of Idmobile.com
Idmobile.com offers both pay-as-you-go and contract plans. Pay-as-you-go plans are ideal for customers who don't want to be tied down to a long-term contract, and they can purchase bundles of data, minutes, and texts as and when they need them.
Idmobile.com offers both pay-as-you-go and contract plans. Pay-as-you-go plans are ideal for customers who don't want to be tied down to a long-term contract, and they can purchase bundles of data, minutes, and texts as and when they need them.
AO.co is a trusted expert in TVs, washing machines, clothes dryers and other household appliances. AO.com is one of the largest retailers in the UK and it specializes in electronics, clothes and home furniture.
At Three, we believe phones are good. They just make life better. Easier. And more fun. But
we all need to find a balance that works for us. Our mission is to help our customers use
their phones to live their best lives.
We make your life easier
Since 1992, we’ve been helping customers get the best deal on their dream phone. We firmly believe in giving you the highest quality, for the lowest price. That’s why we work with three of the UK’s leading networks to do all the haggling for you,...
At Halfords, we're all about the journey. With more than 700 stores with over 10,000 colleagues, we're the UK's leading retailer of automotive and cycling products. We are also the leading operator in MOT, tyres, car servicing and car repairs - pleasing more than 750,000 customers every year.
It's important to us that everyone gets great customer service and can enjoy our products, no matter their level of sight. So, if you're blind, partially sighted or struggle to see or read the screen, we’ve a range of features to help you get the most from our products and...
Look iconic, without the hassle— using Nasty Gal discount codes, you can shop your favorite pieces for way less by simply entering one of our promotional codes (of your choice) at the checkout. From delivery offers, to promo deals, we keep ‘em coming, so you always have the offer you...
The Covid-19 has caused the school and universities to shut down around the world creating a major issue in Learning and Education. As this virus spreads through the interaction and if social distanci... The Covid-19 has caused the school and universities to shut down around the world creating a major...
Why its Important to Manage Your Holiday Calendars?
A printable calendar 2021 is a prominent online platform where you download printable calendars of your choice. These calendars can be customized as per our client requirement with photo, text, logo, or any other image. If you are thinking of planning a dream vacation tour with family and kids but...
Flannel sleepwear is without a doubt one of the most popular ladies sleepwear styles. But do you have any idea what it is exactly? What it is made of? Flannel sleepwear is just one of the many ladies sleepwear styles that are popular today. But do you have any idea...
You have to tackle the challenges that face you by adopting and applying things that work well towards the attainment of your personal goals. A habitual development assists you when trying to achieve goals. Article Tags: Personal Goals, Habitual Developments Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com
What is your main concern when it comes to buying skin care? For many it is knowing what to buy in the first place and do you go for a brand or something cheap? Botanical extracts are all the rage in beauty and skin care products, and for good reason....
There are a vast range of acne products that are available on the market. Obviously you want to be able to ensure that what you buy will help to clear your skin without any harsh side-effects. There are several natural supplements for acne that could help reduce pimples. If you...
Discover the fast, cost affective and long lasting solution to your Cosmetic Dentistry needs. No longer do you need to suffer silently with Teeth that have Worn Enamel or are showing excessive Wear and Tear. Stained Teeth can now also be a thing of the past with the Glamsmile Porcelain...
Women's robes are without a doubt one of the most useful ladies sleepwear styles available today. From refined and worldly to fresh and provocative, there are umpteenth varieties of robes in stock that suit virtually every taste and need. Here we will take a look at some of the more...
For example, most restaurants-especially national franchises have their own website and and allows you to sign up as a member to their website and you get emails that alert you about special deals going on at their restaurant. Source: Free Articles from ArticlesFactory.com
We hear our dentist say Dental Implants and we shiver in fear. This is always due to not understanding the procedure. Once you discover the truth about things such as Technological advances, Procedures required, Time needed for it all and the stunning realistically looking results you will change your mind...
By Anthony Ricigliano - News And Advice by Anthony Ricigliano -- The study of coins, also known as numismatics, has its origins going back to the first exchange of the metal discs for the purpose of commerce. While still hotly debated, its likely that the first coin was minted circa...
These days, there is a great variety of brassiere alternatives. Great styles include everything from full bras and minimizer bras to push up bras and demi cup bras, the choice goes on and on! It can be awe-inspiring trying to determine the different bra styles. The essential thing to bear...
Search topic
Choosing Full Bras
These days, there is a great variety of brassiere alternatives. Great styles include everything from full bras and minimizer bras to push up bras and demi cup bras, the choice goes on and on! It can be awe-inspiring trying to determine the different bra styles. The essential thing to bear...